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This Researcher Has Claimed to Answer Alcohol’s Age Old Mystery

Sep 27, 2016

The search for an instant cure to a hangover can truly be considered the 21st century version of the search for the Fountain of Youth. Every Sunday, millions of party-aged individuals around the world swear on whatever the hold dearest that they’ll never drink again, only to breach that divine verbal contract the very next weekend. Well finally, we have an answer to those pounding headaches and sour stomachs, and it comes from Imperial College Professor, David Nutt (Yes, that’s actually his last name).

Currently going by the name, “Alcosynth,” Professor Nutt and his colleagues made a crazy idea a reality by synthesizing over 90 compounds that mimic the effects of alcohol without any of the nasty side effects. Out of the plethora of possibilities they’ve cooked up, Nutt told The Independent that they’re confident two of them in particular show promise for eventual release. The downside? By the time this miracle liquor hits the shelves, a lot of us may be done with our party days, as Professor Nutt is hoping they can see a 2050 release date for mass consumption. Let’s just hope that Gatorade and greasy food does the trick in the meantime.